The Shoe on the Right…Always.

“Which shoe looks better?” , she asks and stands there assuming I will be able to tell the difference between two black high heeled shoes that, I swear to you, look like they came from the same box.  You know what happens, right?  I say, “They look the same to me.”  She says, “Oh you’re no help.” And she is right.

Now I always say, “Wow, you look hot.  I like the ones on the right.”  She says I always say that.  And she is right. Because it doesn’t matter what I say.  She will tell me the right answer.

For instance, tonight:  Mandy is heading to Harris Teeter to “make groceries” (as they say in New Orleans).  She asks me what I want for lunch tomorrow.  I don’t care isn’t going to be the right answer…I know this.  She is going to get a specific answer.

I ponder tomorrow night’s festivities and know that the unavoidable caloric juggernaut that is Super Bowl Party food will be sufficiently bad for me.  So I asked her to get me some turkey dogs and whole wheat buns.  She makes a face, “The kids don’t like hot dogs and neither do I.”  No hot dogs.

I query, “Well how about leftover Southern Soul BBQ?’  She says that after my 8 year old finishes her dinner tonight, it will be gone.  No Southern Soul.

So I suggest  132 other things, only to get a few no’s and a whole lot of Mandystares.  Here it is…”Okay Dear, what do I want?”

She’ll tell me in her own due time.  Out come the cookbooks and 15 minutes later it is decided and proclaimed: we are having slow cooked beef tacos with some fancy sauce and name.  Sounds better than turkey dogs.

Couldn’t she have just decided that asking me beforehand is an exercise in futility?  No.  She needs me.

In the end, I play the game.   She will tell me the answer and she will look hot as always and I will always get a better meal than I deserve.  I am a smart man.


About mcbud

I am extremely happily married, I have two great kids, I am the hand of the king at a Registered Investment Advisory company, I am addicted to CrossFit, and I try to write.
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16 Responses to The Shoe on the Right…Always.

  1. Stick says:

    I don’t know about eating turkey dogs on Whole wheat buns. Sounds sort of gayish.

  2. Sarah says:

    this makes me stand by my refusal to get married

  3. Stick says:

    Jalapeños and rooster sauce and slaw.

  4. Stick says:

    Lolol at Roxy Moon… Just like the good old days innit? Buddy is just beginning his first blog and is already moderating comments ha!

    Man you are going to find out a lot about the internet if you can keep it up long enough.. You really should switch to ‘blogger’ though. It is a Google product and the interface has gotten really slick over the last couple of years. It only takes five mins to set up a profile and is so easy a cave woman can do it….Tell him Sarah.

  5. Julia says:

    You’re a good man, Charlie Brown.

  6. Stick says:

    Who is this someone that you speak of

  7. Heather says:

    Bostick sent me here. I thought you were a dog, but this is much better.

    She asks you because she needs you. You are very wise to have figured this out. Many men don’t get it until they are on their death beds.

  8. Ashleigh says:

    Do these jeans make my butt look big?

  9. Allison says:

    Magically, you just described how scenes play out at my house, even down to the “you look hot” (except no man calls me “hot”–I get “cute”.)

    Love the new picture!

  10. Bubba says:

    My man…that is indeed how you play the game. They already know the answer. The great part is you can be doing 10 other things when they ask you…great stuff!

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